Abbas-Obama
Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas will meet with President Obama today. Abbas is expected to complain that the Israeli blockade of Gaza is forcing him to wear some of his $2,000 suits twice in the same month.



Fast Food at Home
P.F. Chang's and Burger King are now selling frozen food at supermarkets across the country. Apparently, those restaurant chains are no longer content with killing you when you go out, they want to get you at home too.



Bernanke's Europe Warning
Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke says if we don't cut back our spending, America will go the way of Europe. After hearing that, President Obama authorized another $17 trillion in spending.



Fiorina vs. Boxer
Former Hewlett-Packard CEO Carly Fiorina has won the California Republican senate primary and will face incumbent Democrat Barbara Boxer in November. Fiorina is now hoping to appeal to voters by emphasizing her personal story of working her way up the corporate ladder. Boxer is hoping to win more voters by marrying a richer husband.



BP Promise
BP says the massive oil leak in the Gulf of Mexico will slow to a trickle by next week. Apparently the best way to stop the spill was to give the pipe an enlarged prostate.



Hyatt Meeting
Hyatt hotels is holding its shareholders meeting today, but reporters are being barred from the event... not because Hyatt has anything to hide, just because the company wants to make sure there's enough free coffee and cake for the actual investors.






June 9th


1732: James Oglethorpe is granted a royal charter for the colony of Georgia. Second prize was two royal charters for the colony of Georgia.


1909: Alice Huyler Ramsey becomes the first woman to drive across the United States... beating her husband by 15 days because he refused to ask for directions.


1993: The Minnesota North Stars move to Dallas, along with all three of their fans.